May 2, 2010
Back to Normal Life
I finished my master's program this week, and I am not knee-deep in papers to grade this weekend. I'm a little lost. Really? There's nothing pressing that I must do? So this is how the other people live. Interesting.
March 2, 2010
Hatin'
This week I hate yearbook.
Anyone else?
One more week, and then I'll be DONE.
Probably done like a turkey, though.
Anyone else?
One more week, and then I'll be DONE.
Probably done like a turkey, though.
February 20, 2010
Middle School Drama
One of the things I dislike about teaching middle school is that sometimes the teachers start acting like the students they teach.
Although I have come to terms with being a middle school teacher, there are still days I don't know why I would work in an atmosphere I did not enjoy as a teenager. Why would I subject myself to that daily misery?
I have a few friends whom I often remind, "Just because we teach in middle school does not mean we need to act like middle schoolers." Regardless of middle school atmosphere or not, the truth of the matter is that in any workplace, there will always be people who do not get along. As I tell my own students when they have to work together, that's life in the real world. Personally, I try not to get sucked up into drama and disputes (which doesn't mean I don't casually bitch about work like everyone else), but when I have friends who are suffering through disputes and drama, of course, I'm in. Kind of. It's so much like my own adolescence. Sheesh, I hate conflict! I will defend my friends, but I can get along with a lot of different people. And those different people don't always get along.
So what am I to do? I do as little as possible. Sometimes I have to give lip service. Sometimes I try to bring enlightenment to my different friends about the other friends of mine they don't like.
"I just get the vibe that Martha doesn't like me," says Gertrude.
"Why do you say that?" I ask.
"She's always just so cold toward me. Always acts like she doesn't have the time of day for me," confessed Gertrude.
Oh, cripes! Could it be true? My two friends Gertrude and Martha are enemies?
"You know, Martha isn't someone who really dislikes people she doesn't really know that well. She's just kind of shy at times."
Is that a good enough save? What if Martha really doesn't like Gertrude? She doesn't even really know Gertrude! Am I going to soon be eating lunch alone because two of my friends can't get along?
But they do get along. Thank goodness for that. The issue of dislike is probably imagined. Stupidmiddle school adulthood insecurities.
It's when they don't get along when it's miserable. Who can I talk to? What if they talk about each other to me? Can I remain neutral about the conflict while still being a good friend? If I show too much solidarity with one or the other, will I end up on the outside? You know, like that time in 7th grade when I discovered that a triad of girl besties will only end in tears. Or will it be like high school where I floated from clique to clique, never fitting in anywhere?
My dad would probably say, "Just do your job." Yes, that's the best solution. But should I be anti-social? Be the eccentric teacher down the hallway everybody talks about. I'd like to think that I walk such a line (tightrope?) that few people have much to say about me.
Flying under the radar in neutral territory.
Not as easy as you'd think.
Although I have come to terms with being a middle school teacher, there are still days I don't know why I would work in an atmosphere I did not enjoy as a teenager. Why would I subject myself to that daily misery?
I have a few friends whom I often remind, "Just because we teach in middle school does not mean we need to act like middle schoolers." Regardless of middle school atmosphere or not, the truth of the matter is that in any workplace, there will always be people who do not get along. As I tell my own students when they have to work together, that's life in the real world. Personally, I try not to get sucked up into drama and disputes (which doesn't mean I don't casually bitch about work like everyone else), but when I have friends who are suffering through disputes and drama, of course, I'm in. Kind of. It's so much like my own adolescence. Sheesh, I hate conflict! I will defend my friends, but I can get along with a lot of different people. And those different people don't always get along.
So what am I to do? I do as little as possible. Sometimes I have to give lip service. Sometimes I try to bring enlightenment to my different friends about the other friends of mine they don't like.
"I just get the vibe that Martha doesn't like me," says Gertrude.
"Why do you say that?" I ask.
"She's always just so cold toward me. Always acts like she doesn't have the time of day for me," confessed Gertrude.
Oh, cripes! Could it be true? My two friends Gertrude and Martha are enemies?
"You know, Martha isn't someone who really dislikes people she doesn't really know that well. She's just kind of shy at times."
Is that a good enough save? What if Martha really doesn't like Gertrude? She doesn't even really know Gertrude! Am I going to soon be eating lunch alone because two of my friends can't get along?
But they do get along. Thank goodness for that. The issue of dislike is probably imagined. Stupid
It's when they don't get along when it's miserable. Who can I talk to? What if they talk about each other to me? Can I remain neutral about the conflict while still being a good friend? If I show too much solidarity with one or the other, will I end up on the outside? You know, like that time in 7th grade when I discovered that a triad of girl besties will only end in tears. Or will it be like high school where I floated from clique to clique, never fitting in anywhere?
My dad would probably say, "Just do your job." Yes, that's the best solution. But should I be anti-social? Be the eccentric teacher down the hallway everybody talks about. I'd like to think that I walk such a line (tightrope?) that few people have much to say about me.
Flying under the radar in neutral territory.
Not as easy as you'd think.
January 28, 2010
Oh no! Not the Poetry!
By the end of last quarter I had fallen completely out of love with my creative writing class, and I was crossing my fingers some of them would not come back for the 3rd quarter. Well, thank goodness I have been living clean because my class, although it has about half the old students, has a fresh new attitude.
It's not perfect. I have a loud-mouth (sometimes nasty) girl whom I booted out of my class last year, but once we established in the first couple of days that I would not hold a grudge, and she was able to tell her victim story (about how I wronged her) to anyone who would listen, things have been going okay. She still irritates me, but she is one of the best students, so we are getting by.
But--the rest of them! Wow!
I started off the quarter with poetry, and with this crazy, weird activity called Poetry Poker. My approach is: JUST HAVE FUN WITH THE WORDS! You know, I just about lost them the first night as they struggled to create these poems that didn't make much sense based on the hand they were dealt, but after a while, some of them started creating these incredibly poetic lines. Just one line of brilliance!
Every night, they start off by reading the poetry they wrote the night before, and then I introduce a new poem type. We talk about it, read a few examples, and then they brainstorm a word bank. For the rest of the class period, they fiddle around with the writing. To me, the amazing thing is that they are actually doing it.
Oh, I have these boys...they resist every night. In fact, there isn't a boy in that class who doesn't moan and groan, "Miss! How much longer are we going to be writing poetry?" But then, the next thing you know, they are putting words on paper and it's not bad stuff!
Most nights, it's not brilliant, but there are glimmers of brilliance in a few lines.
Last night, while everyone was discussing what colors their personalities and moods were, trying to express in their poems, I went back to my desk to work on a few things. They were engaged. And here came Marcus, dragging his chair right into my little desk space, to sit next to me. He has been the most resistant, yet when he gets in a groove, he starts writing some deep stuff. But last night, he cracked me up. He wanted to do it, but he didn't want to sit with the other boys or one of the girls whom he has been acquaintances with during the whole year. He wanted my attention; he wanted me to be his writing partner.
So, I coached him along, and before too long, here came Aaron, a student who has been in and out of my classes for the last three years, but earlier this year, we became closer when he was in my proficiency writing class. He was nearly finished and wanted me to read it, but instead of handing it across the desk for me to read, he crowded in behind my little desk area, too. Geez boys!
Apparently, they are getting the getting the feeling of intimacy that poetry--writing in general--can bring. When one shares his inner most thought with his strongest words, it's like opening a piece of the soul. Delicate and vulnerable one might feel, yet there's something about the sharing that becomes rewarding.
So, I guess when I start invading their personal mental space, they feel free to invade my personal physical space. As much as it surprises me, I don't mind. They are all reaping the rewards of a little time to think on a different level. I just hope they can tolerate it a little longer. More good stuff is to come!
It's not perfect. I have a loud-mouth (sometimes nasty) girl whom I booted out of my class last year, but once we established in the first couple of days that I would not hold a grudge, and she was able to tell her victim story (about how I wronged her) to anyone who would listen, things have been going okay. She still irritates me, but she is one of the best students, so we are getting by.
But--the rest of them! Wow!
I started off the quarter with poetry, and with this crazy, weird activity called Poetry Poker. My approach is: JUST HAVE FUN WITH THE WORDS! You know, I just about lost them the first night as they struggled to create these poems that didn't make much sense based on the hand they were dealt, but after a while, some of them started creating these incredibly poetic lines. Just one line of brilliance!
Every night, they start off by reading the poetry they wrote the night before, and then I introduce a new poem type. We talk about it, read a few examples, and then they brainstorm a word bank. For the rest of the class period, they fiddle around with the writing. To me, the amazing thing is that they are actually doing it.
Oh, I have these boys...they resist every night. In fact, there isn't a boy in that class who doesn't moan and groan, "Miss! How much longer are we going to be writing poetry?" But then, the next thing you know, they are putting words on paper and it's not bad stuff!
Most nights, it's not brilliant, but there are glimmers of brilliance in a few lines.
Last night, while everyone was discussing what colors their personalities and moods were, trying to express in their poems, I went back to my desk to work on a few things. They were engaged. And here came Marcus, dragging his chair right into my little desk space, to sit next to me. He has been the most resistant, yet when he gets in a groove, he starts writing some deep stuff. But last night, he cracked me up. He wanted to do it, but he didn't want to sit with the other boys or one of the girls whom he has been acquaintances with during the whole year. He wanted my attention; he wanted me to be his writing partner.
So, I coached him along, and before too long, here came Aaron, a student who has been in and out of my classes for the last three years, but earlier this year, we became closer when he was in my proficiency writing class. He was nearly finished and wanted me to read it, but instead of handing it across the desk for me to read, he crowded in behind my little desk area, too. Geez boys!
Apparently, they are getting the getting the feeling of intimacy that poetry--writing in general--can bring. When one shares his inner most thought with his strongest words, it's like opening a piece of the soul. Delicate and vulnerable one might feel, yet there's something about the sharing that becomes rewarding.
So, I guess when I start invading their personal mental space, they feel free to invade my personal physical space. As much as it surprises me, I don't mind. They are all reaping the rewards of a little time to think on a different level. I just hope they can tolerate it a little longer. More good stuff is to come!
January 12, 2010
Upgrade Them, Please!
Lately the only question that has been on my mind is:
I've about had it with everyone under the age of 19. My middle school students...my high school students...my own children...that teen at the grocery store listening to her music player full blast without headphones. All of them.
You see, I'm beginning to wonder if I have such excellent common sense skills that nobody can hold a candle to me or if somehow the newer models of human beings aren't coming equipped with a good common sense detector. Can we get an upgrade on that somewhere?
In any case, I'm simply exhausted from having to think for myself and everyone else, too.
"Why do I have to do all the thinking?"
I've about had it with everyone under the age of 19. My middle school students...my high school students...my own children...that teen at the grocery store listening to her music player full blast without headphones. All of them.
You see, I'm beginning to wonder if I have such excellent common sense skills that nobody can hold a candle to me or if somehow the newer models of human beings aren't coming equipped with a good common sense detector. Can we get an upgrade on that somewhere?
In any case, I'm simply exhausted from having to think for myself and everyone else, too.
January 3, 2010
It's Been a Lovely Time, But Now Back to the Grind
Over the break, I...
I wish I would have...
- read 6 books (nothing profound, but mostly enjoyable)
- rediscovered a hobby
- spent time with my parents
- caught up on life with my best friend (the one from middle school)
- cooked real meals
- made some white trash goodies: saltine cookies and peanut butter sandwiches
- found two restaurants I liked, including a take-out pizza place down the street (essential for life, right?)
- ate lots of turkey (It was only a 14 lb turkey, but it's STILL not finished!)
- did about 25 hours of work (needed to do more, but everyone is damn lucky I did that much)
- went to bed early A LOT
- woke up naturally and drank a leisurely cup of coffee every morning
- discovered two new shows (to me): Pawn Stars and Criminal Minds
- de-stressed completely
I wish I would have...
- caught up on the feeds in my Bloglines account
- read even more books
- see a few movies
- napped more
- thought of a way to stretch my vacation out even more
January 1, 2010
Onward!
Wow! Was 2009 a crazy year!
A little bad--
or maybe it was simply frustrating--
but there was plenty of good, too!
I'm glad to be through it and ready for a new year!
Happy 2010 everyone!
I hope you have memorable year full of endless opportunities!
A little bad--
or maybe it was simply frustrating--
but there was plenty of good, too!
I'm glad to be through it and ready for a new year!
Happy 2010 everyone!
I hope you have memorable year full of endless opportunities!
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