Wait! There's More: Robotic Responses

Question: I have two pieces of writing to turn in besides my research paper?
Response: Yes. Check the instruction sheet.
Question: So, I can do [rambles off ideas from instruction sheet].
Response: Yes.
Question: Well, what do I think I should do?
Response: What did you write on your project plan what you were going to do?
Question: I dunno.
Response: Look.

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Question: How long does the essay have to be?
Response: Essay length.
(I hate that question and am never quite sure what to say. They want to do just enough to get by rather than fully expressing their thoughts.)
Question: So, five paragraphs?
Response: Sure.

Update: Graycie posted her her approach to exhausting query. Check it out!

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Question: My final drafts have to be typed?
Response: Yes.
Question: Does it matter what font?
Response: 12-point Times New Roman
(Ten years of this particular dialogue running throughout the year makes me wonder if I should just tattoo it on my forehead.)

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Question: I have to turn in my rough drafts and notes and stuff?
Response: Yes. It goes in the third section of your portfolio.
Questions: What if I didn't keep them?
Response: I'm sorry you didn't follow directions.

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Question: What if I don't do [Insert project part here]? How much will it hurt my grade?
Response: I don't know. I can't do that kind of math in my head.
Question: Like will it drop me down to a [insert unacceptable grade here]?
Response: It could happen. Why didn't you do it?
Response: I dunno.

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Question: So, like, I have to have a binder or something to put all this stuff in?
Response: Yes.
Question: What if I don't have one?
Response: What if things are lost?

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Question: So, everything is due tomorrow?
Response: Yes.
Questions: What if I don't get it all done?
Response: That would be a bummer for you.