March 11, 2007

Hella Funny Trick

Dude, you know what would be like so hella funny? What if I like took the lid off a jar of like, you know, that pizza sauce. But then I put it on, only like, not really. And like this total mom comes along and like grabs it off the shelf and it like PPSHHHHHHHHHHHHHH all over the place. Yea! That would be so cool! And she'd be like, "What the--?" and she'd be holding on to this lid, but the jar would be like shattered all over the floor! Like glass! And red stuff like dripping. And she'd be like one of those moms who like doesn't like her kids to like be messy, and she is always making them like wash their hands and stuff. Yeah, she would be like the perfect person! That would be so freakin' cool man!

No! Wait! What would be even better if she like somehow got the jar into her like, you know, cart without the jar going all PPSHSSSSSSSSSSSSSSShhhhhhhhhhhh all over the floor. Yeah. And then she gets to the like, you know, checkout. And it's like a really busy day and there are like, all these people waiting in line. But like, you know, it's this mom's turn next and she's putting her stuff like on that thing that like moves to that check-out person. Yeah, it would be so much friggin' more awesome if she picked up the sauce and then it went PPSHHHHHHHHHH. Like all over the place. There's be sauce all over her like stuff, like her bread and carrots. Oh! And her shoes would be like, splattered, and she'd be standing there going, "What the flip?" with this like pizza sauce dripping down her arm. Only she'd probably really cuss, but like only in her head 'cuz she's like one of those mom types who tries to like act like everything is all cool.

Oh man! That would be so freakin' funny! All the people in line would be like looking at her like she is some sort of an idiot for breaking this jar, only she is standing there looking all confused because she was just like taking it out of the cart when it went PPPPSHHHHHHHHH all over the like magazines and stuff! And everyone is checking their shoes and giving her dirty looks. But nobody wants to be like in that line anymore because there's all this like sauce all over the place and it kind of looks like blood, so everyone gives her this like really dirty look and goes to different like, checkers, even though they've been like, standing there forever. Man, they'd be really pissed and they'd be like, pissed, at this mom. And this mom is standing there, like covered in red stuff, and she's trying to tell the checker that there's like, this mess, but the checker is like, ignoring her. And this like mom is trying to tell everyone that the jar just like came open but like nobody believes her.

Yea, that would be like so freakin' funny!

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